per·spec·tive
/pərˈspektiv/
noun 1. the art of drawing solid objects on a two-dimensional surface so as to give the right impression of their height, width, depth, and position in relation to each other when viewed from a particular point. "a perspective drawing" 2. a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view. "most guidebook history is written from the editor's perspective"
Hello Aviator parents and happy summer to you! As I type this, we are on the eve of the final day of the 21-22 school year. As many of you already know, I will not be returning to RTE next year. I am so appreciative of the overwhelming messages from you (and even gifts!) that I will hold near and dear for the remainder of my career in education. I will be joining a middle school in Lexington school district 2 that is much closer to home. I don't think I'd have ever guessed I would drive 45 minutes both ways to work had I not loved your children so much. I've no doubt the new school counselor will be a wonderful addition to the faculty, and to your students' lives. Please take a moment to welcome him/her when the time comes, and encourage your student to do the same. Change is hard but I love ol' Pooh's perspective in the clip above. When we think about things differently, we feel about them differently. This year the students have learned a lot in "SEL" (social emotional learning). I've had some meaningful conversations with students both in the classroom setting, and in individual or small group settings. I typically end the year with information on summer camps, etc. Not this time. Especially with the events that have happened in Uvalde Texas, I'm more convinced than ever our children (yes..including my own) need our strong guidance. Many, many times this will feel like the opposite of friendship. It's not fun when our children are angry at us but it's about perspective (my absolute favorite thing to teach and the subject of this last blog post). Usually when our children are angry about a decision we've made about their well-being, we can feel safe in knowing we did the right thing. When our children are grown raising their own children, THEN we can consider something more along the lines of friendship. Do not be afraid to set those boundaries! For me personally the most painful thing is to see your child ostracized because of these decisions. I refused to allow my children to have cell phones until at least the 8th grade. They were teased for sure, and often left out of things because they didn't have these devices to soothe that fear of missing out. I was not very popular with them believe me BUT when one exercises perspective, in the grand scheme of things it just wasn't a big deal and still isn't. I'm certain the foremost thought of any parent who lost a child at Robb Elementary in Uvalde, Tx does not include regret about not buying the most updated cell phone, athletic shoes or whatever. My guess would be they are thinking about that last laugh, the last book read together, the last hug, the last "I love you too", the last camping trip, the last holiday, the last family picture, the way their child's hair smells after a bath, etc. This is a healthy perspective that was brutally forced upon these parents by unthinkable and tragic events that took all the next laughs, next books read together, next hugs, next I love yous, next camping trips, next holidays, next family pictures and next gentle whiffs of their child's scent away forever. Although tragic, please don't let the sense of perspective offered here in this blog disappear. Honor these lost children by remembering what is and isn't important in the grand scheme of things, especially when parenting becomes hard and emotions run high. Parents aren't meant to be friends with their children. That comes later....much later. Teach kindness and connection with others despite differences...in opinions, ability and looks! Not that it is ever rationalized but we know that very often perpetrators of crimes such a what happened at Robb Elementary often have histories of being ostracized and misunderstood by others. A little kindness and connection may help 1 person today, or 21 people years down the road. In the meantime and as a parent, limit access to media sources in all things, not just this event. Your child may have questions so I'm including some resources that may be helpful if needed.
Thank you for sharing your children with me for the last six years! Have a wonderful and safe summer, and keep all things in perspective.
~Always an Aviator, Mrs. Tanner, RTE School Counselor
p.s. enjoy this pic from today's snow cone party! Then look at it again...Perspective...these are all 4th graders, just like the ones lost in Tx.
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